Jan 2002 age 43

The "Black Lagoon" phase
Big news brings Michael out of his Howard Hughes-like life and back into the spotlight when he charges his record company, Sony, is "racist". That's why his "Invincible" CD sold 2 million copies; Sony didn't promote him enough. He sez. We all get to gasp anew and ask the question - WTF?! Seems he's had his nose fixed,,,WHEW! and just got out of bed. As it is reported in the news it seems a bridge was built to widen the nasal passages. "Thank God!" the headlines say. Poor thing probably couldn't breathe! with those teensy bitty nostrils. Oh How Nice For Him! Perhaps his singing will improve, since his last album was 70 minutes of hiccups, grunts, fake crying and yips. One has to wonder why, with all his money, he can't seem to find plastic surgeons who are capable of actually doing plastic surgery. The "fixed" bridge appears as two lumpy lines and not what say, just for the sake of argument, a plastic surgeon might put in someone's face to create a nose bridge. Maybe this is a new trend in Breath-Rite Strip implants? One wonders what those Jutting Gill Bumps were on the sides of his jaw in 1997. Mike ruins his symmetry schtick with mismatched, lopsided eyes and lipstick like my senile Aunt Margaret wears. Music critics and even those in the record industry are saying OK, quite enough from this goof. There is even a TV special in the UK asking - If this is what the guy is doing to his outside, then what the hell is going on inside? What's happened to our Michael?